well another step closer...

I have managed to get the first DNA samples and will send them to the lab tomorrow by fedex. The final piece of the puzzle will be sending the swab kit to the get the sample that will seal the deal. It has been promised to me and I trust it will be delivered per the agreement. It is to be my Christmas gift...the DNA sample. It means so much to me. I was told by the person that he loves me whether I am biologically related or not. I am getting the feeling that I am French and I am truly the family member I have been brought up to be.Within a few weeks, this should be pulled together. I feel like I am hlding my breath waiting...

All about taking risks...

I have been exchanging emails with the individual I've been talking about. To put it less cryptic, I wanted him to do a dna swab for me.I feared coming out with it as I had written and discussed the topic and he said how it didn't make any difference now as most of the people involved are dead. Live for today and focus on how the the now, the misery of parts of my life made me stronger and made me be able to be so much a better spouse and mother, etc.
With the early trauma of the nuns emotional abuse and serious issues discussed regularly in our house hold regularly openly and freely at home...It, you see, put me in a position of hearing my father lament over my mothers exploits, and
at a certain point, I would hear the same stories again and again and I would think to myself, shut the fuck up... don't keep talking about..take action. Easier saidn; 6 kids to support. He was at the same time a loving tha man that gave us the love, materal goods necessary, brought us many places we wanted to go. Bought so much food home that my mother would mske up to 3 entrees at one meal. Bev and I grew up with to much fat in our bodies, food was equated with comfort I'd think and We all many times hdce battled fatness, Food was our celebration in life and there was no limit to the amount we could it.
So tired. love my readers AND ANN, YOU ARE MY ONLY BLOG FOLLOWER!!!!! ASK QUESTIONS
AS i WILL EXPLAIN TO YOU THE SITUATION.
aT ANY RATE, jASON AGREED TO SEND ME A DNA SWAB AND IT WILL BE SO IMPORTANT.

everything and nothing

i continue to have problems losing long blogs...then losing faith.
I remember a friend saying he writes in a word processing program then copy, pastes the work to email and i suppose this will work with blogs as well. now i need to upload a word processing program to my computer. i may have to open that windows package after all this time. go figure...
priseverlasting